Even Small Town Kissing Brands Women Slut Girls

Every day I’m more convinced that the biggest challenge in eroticism for American women — as opposed to French, Italian, Brazilian and other European cultures too numerous to count — is the respectability concerns about exploring sexuality with a trusted partner. American women still get totally mixed messages on sexuality. (See Sensuality News fashion editorial photos of Japanese Glam Goth by Vikram Pathak.)

Life for today’s young women is frightfully complex, with slut girl taunts being texted far and wide in the digital universe and not only by guys. Girls can be enemy number one. 

My horrific run in with the Catholic Church, when a priest believed my attacker (my parents’ best friend) and not me, was preceded by an earlier memory. When Father Ben subsequently denied me communion to protect me from myself and further damnation in hell over a double fault mortal sin, I had an earlier slut girl memory of my own.

It was a double date at a football game, and there was some making out going on in the back seat on the way home. He was a stud muffin junior and I thought I mattered.  It’s the classic story, one that most American women live through. I’ll have to find out what life is like in France of Brazil for young women. 

I don’t know how today’s young people count sexual scoring, but I’d say he didn’t get to first base. It was just kissing, although even then nobody had to give me lessons. Sensuality always came naturally to me. 

The following day I went to the library, which was on the other side of the study hall. Focused on my mission of procuring Tolstoy, Sigmund Freud or his equivalent, I walked into the study hall in another world — until the coughing started. 

First one, then two … then more coughs … louder until there was no doubt what was going on. I saw my friend looking at me silently. A round of applause might have been welcomed — like I had won the title of Preeminent Kissing Queen or its equivalent in my small town. 

Our eyes locked and no words were required. I was only happy that I had all my bases intact and hadn’t left my catcher’s mitt in the car. 

There were no awards for me that day, except for that brief moment when I was the school’s slut girl.

Luckily, we moved away from town, although having to visit my beloved grandmother got me in trouble with Slick Dick.  When a guy comes after you when you’re sleeping with your hair in curlers next to his six-year-old daughter, it’s pretty hard to believe you caused it, no matter what mom, dad and Father Ben say. 

My aunt, uncle and grandmother stood firm with me. It’s not as if I had no backup. 

I was in college before I ever willingly let anyone touch me again, after Library Lesson 101 about expressing female sexuality. 

As everyone knows, I believe in eroticism and have reconciled all these pieces of myself, scattered far and wide. Sensual and Superyoung is the story of that journey and what I learned along the way — which was plenty. 

For all the kicks in the butt that I give American women about our repressed sexuality, I want to acknowledge that I know how it feels. It took decades before I stitched together the pieces of my whole sensual self.  

So come along now. We’re on a big trip to the south of France and the Italian Riviera, to listen to cultures very different from ours.

If American women see ourselves as peaking at about 25 — and we do — unlike French women who say 20 years later at 45; and if we’re still working our way out of the slut-girl trauma, when we graduate from college, then it’s just one more reason we’re screwed in the bedroom.

We don’t even have time to heal our sexual selves— unless you follow my advice and spend plenty of time learning your French lessons. Anne

Sensual and Superyoung

In our new lineup you will find me — Anne —  in third person:

Sensual Health | scientific articles about sexuality, sensual aging, and even Martha Stewart’s food fantasies 

Sensual Vitality Blog | quickies that track Anne’s view of new research and cultural news about sensuality

Sensual and Superyoung | the book, a work in process

Love Food | sometimes called aphrodisiacs, we’re building a scientific list of the key sensual wellness benefits of eating nature’s bounty and avoiding fast food on every street corner

Love Food Recipes | Only healthy, sensually-nourishing, libido-enhancing recipes from the world’s best chefs and kitchen-bloggers. 

Bad News Food |  confronting food facts is another key part of our food science approach to vitality, sensual wellness and being Superyoung.  No political correctness allowed. This is science.

Anne’s Original Journal | She’s back!!! Now scattered throughout the pages of Anne of Carversville, we’ve pulled Anne’s soul and psyche back together, when the topic is her own road to self-actualization.