Updated: Sept. 17, 2010
This article has moved into our Top 15 reads, presumably because of our Zestra articles. I just wrote an extensive answer to an intelligent comment to a male reader who challenged me that a female vagina can have sex at any time, whereas a man must have a strong erection to have sex. See Zestra | Media Censors Again Double Standard Female Sexuality.
Both assertions are wrong but represent widely-held views of sexual anatomy. I believe that the media’s refusal to advertise Zestra is directly tied to our inability to discuss the vagina in public. As the following article highlights, women can’t discuss their vaginas either — but for good reason.
Just reading the new articles about Zestra’s problems placing ads on TV, radio and Facebook reminds us that vaginas remain a verboten subject in American culture.
Updated: Feb. 23, 2010. Originally written Oct. 28, 2007.
We’ve made soooo much progress in 30 months:
1) San Francisco’s Stript Wax Bar is introducing the Vajacial, suggested for women who get Brazilian waxes.
“We developed the Vajacial to really address and treat the key needs of anyone who gets waxed,” Stript owner Katherine Goldman said in a press release. “Your ‘little lady’ will thank us!”
Personally, I’m thrilled my ‘little lady’ can get a Vajacial. Can my vagina come, too?
2) Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation now promises to tighten the walls of our vaginas. Dr. Lauri Romanzi, prominent reconstructive pelvic surgeon, urogynecologist and authority on vaginal rejuvenation, has joined More magazine’s “Reinvention Convention” tour, joining More Magazine’s editor-in-chief, Lesley Jane Seymour on the speaking tour.
I don’t mean to be a smarty pants, but reading the press release, I can’t tell if Dr. Romanzi is speaking about her noble work with the Harvard Humanitarian Initiative (HHI) to the Democratic Republic of Congo, where she conducted reconstructive surgeries for women; OR how women can get a like-new vagina with Kegel exercises (they work) or other services from The Perfect Phit; OR some other vagina-related topic from her book ‘Plumbing and Renovations’.
3) Labiaplasty has gotten a lot more popular in 30 months. It’s easy to be flip about labiaplasty, but these before and after photos from labiaplastysurgeon.com underscores that the surgery can be about more than vaginal vanity.
AlterNet blasts labiaplasty and these same photos to kingdomcum, suggesting that women should stop trying to look like Playboy bunnies. I’ll refrain from negative comments, because I admit that I’ve only viewed the surgery as pure vanity until this moment, and I’m more sensitive about these matters.
At least AlterNet calls a vagina a vagina and gets about 500 points for using the word.
My update concludes that while women are more engaged with our vaginas since I wrote my original post, we still don’t use the word that accurately and scientifically describes our gorgeous, female anatomy and pleasure center.
Knowing that I can be irreverent and full of wry, acerbic humor some days, I don’t find vajayjays funny. If American women were comfortable with our bodies and positive about our sexuality, then pet names would be fine with me.
The truth is that American women haven’t embraced our vaginas with the love they deserve. Hope springs eternal on my end.
4) Wait a darn minute. I forgot to tell you about Kady Gaga’s vagina up there at the top of the page. Gaga did appear at the UK’s Brit Awards last week, where she won 3 awards — none for her vagina, but hey whatever Goga wants, Gaga does. It’s all beautiful … well mostly.
Original Post Oct. 2007
I pride myself on being an in-the-know woman. I also admit to turning off the tube almost permanently, although it will be on tonight for HBO’s “Tell Me You Love Me.”
I don’t watch “Grey’s Anatomy” and I don’t even catch Oprah much anymore.
So here I am, a well-established lingerie, cultural trends and women’s lifestyle consultant, and I don’t know about “vajayjays”. Do you?
No Longer a Private Matter
Thanks to today’s “NY Times Style Section”, which is really spreading its wings these days, we now know that “vajayjay” is another word for vagina.
The word was used on “Grey’s Anatomy”, in an effort not to affront the Federal Communications Commission with too many references to women’s sexual anatomy.
People ARE Watching
Saying bad words can get one in trouble these days, although the “Times” reports that F.C.C. spokesman David Fiske, insists that the agency does not count the number of times words like penis and vagina are used on a show, especially within an appropriate context.
Given that only five years ago, then Attorney General John Ashcroft ordered the covering of two Capitol-gracing classical statues, the Majesty of Law, and the Spirit of Justice, I understand distrust of the F.C.C.’s objectives and intentions.
Theoretically “Grey’s Anatomy’s” then pregnant doctor Miranda Bailey didn’t actually have to admonish a male intern with the words “Stop looking at my vajayjay”, when she went into labor. The F.C.C. would have understood such an unlady-like outburst for a woman going into labor.
A Brief History of Vajayjays.
Regena Thomashauer’s outrageously articulate book about women’s right to sexual pleasure, “Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts“ is in my library. I forgot about the vajayjays.
Mama Gena reminds us that admiring the gorgeosity of our vajayjays leads to life success in and out of the bedroom. Right on, Mama.
Sermon on the Mount
America’s metaphorical top mama, The Big O, loves talking about vajayjays. “I think va-jay-jay is a nice word, don’t you?” Oprah asks, looking directly into the TV monitor. “Everybody who watches “Greys Anatomy” knows that’s where we got that from.”
One audience member announces that she and her sisters call their private parts “nunu.” “My nunu’s name is ‘Lavender,’” she says. “I thought I’d share that with 30 million people.”
Tune in here for another Oprah discussion on vajayjays, this time with a transgender woman. I counted four vajayjas to two vaginas.
Buying Into Vajayjays
Pop-junkie.com accuses the prince of clothes porn, former Gucci creative director Tom Ford of selling vajayjay juice, instead of his new Tom Ford fragrance.
American entrepreneurial spirit kicks up the subject yet another notch. Imagine inviting colleagues into your office, with your mug of morning coffee that says “Stop Looking At My Vajayjay.”
Would Anyone Like a Hoodie
I think you can get booted out of corporate America for even thinking such a thing, let alone doing it.
In “6 Ways to Generate Buzz About Your Business“ The Agency blogger Giovanni Gallucci advises us to incorporate something considered to be taboo in your message… like the word vajayjay.
Declawing the Kitty
“The reason that vajayjay has caught on, I think, is because there is a black — Southern especially — naming tradition, which is to have names like Ray Ray and Boo Boo and things like that,” Dr. McWhorter said for the NYTimes.
“It sounds warm and familiar and it almost makes the vagina feel like a little cartoon character with eyes that walks around.” Nice visualization, Dr. McWhorter.
Funny, I never thought of my vagina as a cartoon character. I dare say the men I’ve known in my life didn’t think of it that way either.
A French View of Vejayjays
A few years ago, I worked on a new lingerie brand, conceived by two young, in-the-know guys and their friend, a NYC designer. Created for strong, confident women, the existing design direction was too innocent to support the name and brand imagery that went with such a concept.
Unfortunately, the girls didn’t get along well, and they backed the girlfriend — understandably I suppose. It was a great concept which unfortunately didn’t go very far.
The boldly named ‘Vagin Pouvoir’ lingerie brand begged for a dramatic, very sexy and equally powerful design statement, not another beautiful lace bra.
The Essence of Female Pouvoir
I don’t believe that a Vagin Pouvoir woman walks around calling her vagina a vajayjay. And she doesn’t need a mug to convey the idea that she means business.
The Vagin Pouvoir brand message resonates in my mind today. “The Vagin Pouvoir Woman is an influential, smart and successful woman unabashed by sexuality. She is unafraid to be sensual, but always exudes it with the utmost class. Any woman can be this woman when she unleashes her inner ‘vagin pouvoir’.
A 21st Century Message
” The Vagin Pouvoir woman is the diamond of the world: indestructible and radiant. She is the envy of all and the possession of none. It is her seductive power that gives rise to the lingerie. She validates everything this name stands for. This is her world, her Vagin Pouvoir.”
I’ve spent the last month creating a presentation about alpha women in search of inner tao power.
Seriously, ladies. Isn’t that message more inspiring than turning our vaginas into cartoon characters. Go for it VP. (Update: Alas, they didn’t make it. Bras more expensive than La Perla’s are tough selling, even before the global economic meldown.)